Sticky Fingers

There is no good way to write about yesterday morning's events. So, I have to timeline them.

9:00 AM: Bode down for nap

9:01 AM: Snack for girls. Dora on TV. Perfect.

9:08 AM: Pull myself together.

9:28 AM: Chloe decorates her shirt with permanent marker.

9:35 AM: Fix girls' hair. Brush their teeth.

10:45 AM: Bode's up. We head out to run errands.

10:53 AM: Visit Deb (my mother-in-law) at boutique where she works.

10:56 AM: Ali loves fancy ring at boutique. Diva for sure.

11:12 AM: Off to Subway for lunch (went surprisingly well).

11:48 AM: Super WalMart.

11:53 AM: Made it to Aisle 2 and Chloe has to go potty. Ali keeps pinching hip.

11:54 AM: Mad dash to back of store restrooms. Hope we aren't leaving a trail.

11:56:59 AM: Finally made it to restrooms. Family restroom locked. Women's closed for cleaning. Shit.

11:57:01 AM: "Mommy, I have to go potty really bad!"

11:57:04 AM: Mad dash to front of store restrooms. Hope we are leaving a trail. As far as I'm concerned, the custodian can follow it. Should be easy to find. It will start right where the closed bathroom sign is sitting.

11:58 AM: Run into neighbor. Force a smile to hide misplaced rage with custodian.

11:59 AM: Chloe is relieved. And, so am I.

12:09 PM: Shopping recommences. Ali keeps pinching hip.

12:35 PM: Unload groceries at home. Put Bo in highchair .. mmmm bananas.

12:47 PM: Notice something sparkly on Ali's finger. Realize she stole fancy ring from boutique and had been hiding it in her underwear. ALI GRACE KOCK.

12:48 PM: Attempt to be rational. Contemplate punishments.

12:53 PM: Call police Deb.

12:54 PM: Rush to get Bode out of highchair. Deb gets off at 1. Tray crashes to the floor. Bananas everywhere. Ugh.

12:55 PM: I babble the whole way to boutique about stealing. Law. Sin. Jail. Babble. Babble.

1:05 PM: Return ring to boutique. Ali apologizes. She feels better when grandma hugs her. I don't, but am glad she does.

1: 15 PM: Home for naptime. And cleaning nasty bananas off the floor.